I love you Cairo, but it was time to leave you

July 27, 2011 I left Cairo. Nearly three years after arriving in August 2008. Why did I leave?

Long answer. When I started the advertising job in August 2010 I said I would stay there for a year and then go home. I left the job before that but sort of always planned on leaving in August anyways. This plan was kept inside my head or whispered to close confidants. Who wants to live somewhere as if they are leaving? Better those around you think of you as being there for a while. To continue, Ramadan is a great time to be a non-Muslim in a non-Muslim country and three years is a good amount of time to be away from home. Three years is also a "shit or get off the pot" point. As in, I needed to commit to Cairo for real, learn Arabic, get my own apartment and start thinking of it as a permanent home and not just "where I was" or leave.

Other contributing factors include, but are not limited to... increasing national instability, most of my friends having left or planning to leave (bye Chrissie, Mike, Yusef and others), increased desire for pork products, increased desire for mountains, increased need for family hugs, decreased desire for noise and air pollution, my parents for the first time in three years saying "we would like it if you were home," increase desire for sister time, increased feelings of disconnection from friends stateside, and a nagging sensation (to use a cliche phrase) to start creating a permanent life somewhere (well not really permanent).

I think it is a little weird I feel like I have to justify leaving a country, but I do. Why? Well, I really loved Cairo. Still do actually. I had a job I liked, a pretty rad business (Cairo Cocktails), good friends, a handle on the scene and more of all of the goodness to come. But, the daily difficulties were beginning to outweigh the epic weekends and crystal blue seas. Post-revolution life for foreigners is dramatically different in many good, expected and annoying ways.  After three years I was starting to get to reactive and losing all patience with random people on the streets. In the weeks before I left I threw half a kilo of apricots a man in BMW when he pulled up next to me and told me I had a nice ass. True statement, but unwanted and tacky to put it nicely. After I felt only regret at not having rotten fruit to throw. Also, I hit a man with a book in the metro when he whispered something nasty to me as I walked in front of him. Also, I screamed at the government customs agents who stormed my work office. Who yells at government agents? The negatives of Cairo were beginning to overtake the many positives. Time to leave with happy thoughts in my head.

So after a particularly rough week in June I decided why wait till August? Why not just leave before then? Bought a ticket and started feeling really good about the decision. Who knows, after a few months of a depressed American economy, my faded tan, Tea Party idiots on the news, missing Cairo friends, Seattle rain and job searching I might be crying for Cairo. I will keep you posted.

For now though I looking forward to hiking, road trips, weddings, greenery, mid-west visits, friends a phone call away, election season and getting reacquainted with the USA.

Amazing to have been in Cairo.

Good to be home.

For mothers

For the mothers still with us and those that have passed. Because we never had to ask you to take care of us. You just did. Thank you.

Virginity Tests: A Revolutionarily Disgusting Idea

Every man and woman should remember every single woman they see walking down the street is someone's mother, sister, auntie, grandma, niece or cousin etc. There is no "other" type of women, as the Major Amr Imam of the Egyptian Army claims when talking about the protesters who were arrested and forced to undergo "virginity tests. He told CNN that


 “The girls who were detained were not like your daughter or mine. These were girls who had camped out in tents with male protesters in Tahrir Square, and we found in the tents Molotov cocktails and (drugs). We didn’t want them to say we had sexually assaulted or raped them, so we wanted to prove that they weren’t virgins in the first place. None of them were (virgins).”


Articles are here and here


The women who were a part of the Jan25 Revolution were exactly the same as your mother, your sister, your aunt etc. They were then and are now women, like all women. Their bodies are their own. Their virginity is their concern and not a tool to be used by police to show the jailer's innocence upon release. Though varied in size, shape and color, women's bodies are fundamentally the same. The rights all women should have to protect and keep our bodies safe should be as similar. 


"Othering" a segment of the population is popular in every country. "They" are on welfare, only "they" do drugs, I won't get AIDS because I am not one of "them". Well in a city were 98% of women report getting sexually harassed on a daily basis there really is no "other" type of woman. If you are a guy and you still think only a "certain" type of girl gets harassed you are blind, ignorant and scared. 


Egypt is changing, slowly, but change is happening. Some women I know report less harassment and some report more. Certainly all reports from Tahrir during the height of the Revolution were of men and women side by side in the most respectful and equal manner. Keep the faith Egypt; get vocal and get upset about this behavior. Sexual abuse by the police or army is not set aside for women only. Men are victims of this as well and will be as long as it is tolerated in any form. No country will ever be a great country until all its citizens are equal and feel equally safe. 


I don't know of a country where women feel totally safe. But I had never heard of a country that peacefully deposed an autocratic ruler in less than 30 days either and Egypt you did just that. The world expects the worst from you, keep showing them the best. Be upset about this, be vocal in your opposition and keep demanding better from your countrymen and women.

Monday Song

This is what really matters

We all know the importance of hair. Historically (Samson and Delilah), biblically (washing feet with it), economically (you can sell it for wigs at a good price), sexually (otherwise why would some suggest women hide it?), children's books (Rapunzel) and socially (oh girl, you got that good hair). So while the fires of revolutions rage throughout the Middle East (a region particularly adverse to hair), Europe gets bailed out and America attempts to get rid of all forms of social welfare programs I say we focus on what really matters: the hair of important people or people we see on TV a lot. There are a few standout men and women in the public eye who would clearly be less important without their hair. Here are my nominations for best hair on the heads of a semi-polical figures.

Best Braids: Omar Bin Laden, son of Osama.

Hot dam his hair is sexy. 

How can Obama ignore his request for more information about the death of his father when faced with such sexy braids? He can't. Expect a press release soon and those photos people won't stop whining about.

Best Dye Job: Mubarek

His 30 year rule played second fiddle to his hair's eternal darkness. Like the Pharaohs before him, beauty mattered. Check my last post on his personalized pin-stripes.  Unlike the Pharaohs Mubarek did not prepare for his after life with the same vigor and we must be assumed his hair has faded, his riches will be looted and his tomb will go undecorated. 

Hair as Stupid as its Owner Sounds: Donald Trump

I am not a fan of "The Donald" and his hair does not help the cause. I do find it amazing that the stupidity of his hair style has been trumped (pun intended) by the stupidity of his "presidential campaign". The biggest crime Donald commits is giving red heads everywhere a bad name as most of us have wonderful hair. He should be kicked out of the tribe and forced to go brunette. I bet Mubarek's colorist is unemployed and could help him out with that transition.

Best Follicle Reason to Put a Ring On It: Kate Middleton

Apparently Kate's hair is her best asset. I doubt that, but it did become the most asked for hairstyle in New York salons almost overnight. 

Cairo 1950s

 

"Who's goals are different and destinies intersected, the struggle between life and people gets more intense. Life is as vibrant as this timeless river and people live it heading for the unknown."

That suit!

There is no reason for this post other than the photo below. You know you were a gangster when you had a pin-stripped suit with your name as the stripes.  WOW. Do you think Qaddafi has one? Would he know how to spell his name in English? Qaddafi Gaddafi, Kadaffi, Q'addafi and the list goes on. Even Hosny is potentially misspelled. Could by Hosni. Hope his tailor did not get in trouble for that. What do you think it is like to the tailor to someone like Mubarek?

This photo is second possibly only to the creatively hilarious website that is...

Kim Jong-Il Looking at Things. You will not be disappointed.

Or is the winner the Will Ferrel as Harry Carry vs Qaddafi mashup?

Not sure who wins. 

Maybe this amazing story I heard from a friend about Libyan state TV before Qaddaffi started killing everyone. The brother in law of my friend, let's call him Jim, was in Libya for work. Noting the extreme lack of night life Jim went back to his hotel room after dinner to watch some TV. A few minutes into his program the broadcast cuts and Qaddaffi appears on screen for a service announcement. In this announcement he immediately begins to yell at the TV audience, screaming "You are wasting your lives watching TV. You are useless, lazy and good for nothings. Get up and do something." The PSA  abruptly ends and regular programming continues. Um, what? Can you imagine watching a CSI rerun and all of the sudden Qaddaffi is on the screen screaming about how lazy you are for watching state TV? Amazing.

But, I don't want the epic stories of craziness to over shadow the cruel, murderous and senseless actions of Qaddaffi. Crazy or not he is one horrible SOB who is joined by far to many dictators we tend to pass off as "crazy," "delusional," or "eccentric". When really they are just murders.